


School Crush

by Jcourage



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, High School, M/M, Oneshot, Phan - Freeform, Unrequited Love, don't know how to tag yet, new
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-22
Updated: 2015-11-22
Packaged: 2018-05-02 22:07:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5265434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jcourage/pseuds/Jcourage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil and Dan are high school friends and Phil can’t get rid of the feeling he gets no matter how hard he try but he thinks he sees Dan happier with other people and decides he just can’t be friends with him anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	School Crush

**Author's Note:**

> First Oneshot! Might Edit it more later.

There he is. The perfect typical love of my life you see in all chick flicks. My best friend across the hall. Dan. I don’t even know how this little crush happened. Was it the moment I met him or did it gradually grow like our friendship did? 

Oh wait, it was actually when he told me he liked this mutual girl we hung out with. Tracy? I don’t remember. I am always forgetting names. That’s why history was never my best subject. 

Anyways, I just remembered my heart at that moment, wishing that this mutual girl was really just me in disguise. Instead of a cute small long haired blonde girl it would be me, a tall dorky short haired lad. Because darn if I don’t want to just have him at my house every Saturday like we used to do when we were younger. 

I remembered the look he had when he told me. He looked so worried to tell me. We made an unspoken pack really that we would start dating until when we both have people we like but to be fair that was totally unrealistic. He had such a serious adorable heart though for thinking about that.

During their dating, I naturally put space in-between us because knowing him, he wouldn’t know how to do it himself. This is how you can tell I was the oldest in the group. Or better yet the duo. While Dan was a sophomore and I was senior. I had to grow up compared to my parents but for Dan I was just enough mature. Dan didn’t really notice it at first but by the time he did notice the distance it was only really due to the breakup. It was a problem because he needed me there to help him vent about the breakup. 

He was just too oblivious to know why there was a distance in the first place and once I finally started the conversation back up because he had no self-resilience when it came to Dan, he left the whole distance thing disappear. 

Fast forward back to the present me, he thought as he see Dan approach him at their designated lunch table. “Hey, how did you do in Mr. Brown test? I really need to stop procrastinating, I probably failed.” He said with a chuckle as he open his cup of fruit. I just shake my head in a disappointing parent way and said to study harder. 

I loves this. Just me and Dan. If it could be like that forever, I would be over joyed. After a few minutes our other friends came to sit and the conversation changed to talking about how Dan should hook up with yet another girl. 

You see, Dan is not a player or anything like that, it’s just he’s the only person in our little gang that actually even saw a girls... Uh... Chest, so a lot of the guys wanted to live through him. 

I hate this type conversations, whenever I hear how much people want him to go with this girl I just gets in a bad move. He’s mine. Okay maybe not as possessive as I sound but I just really want him as my only best friend. That’s normal, Right?

“Hey, Phil, are you listen?” I hear Chris talking to me while snapping his fingers in front of me. 

Oh god I didn’t hear what they were talking about but knowing them, I already knew how to handle this awkward situation. So I say “Yeah Dan you should ask her out. Be fearless. Make me proud.” In a laughing tone.

“See!” Chris flung his hands in the air as a sign of discovery “You have a Lester high permission. That has to count for something.”

As I looked at Dan though, he didn’t seem amused. Something was up. I asked if something was wrong and what I heard was something I wasn’t expecting.  
“Ah yeah guys. About that being a girl, it’s a guy. I’m bi.” He said in a nervous tone but as well as of a matter of fact reveal. Chris didn’t seem off about it at all and just asked what he was like and Dan was like a little kid, just so happy they didn’t judge. 

“He’s great and so cute and shorter than me by a lot so that’s nice because you know short people are freaking adorable. And so nice. And playful like he jokes around in class all the time but not in an obnoxious way.” When he said how short people were so cute It stung a little because I knew I could never be what he wanted but now even when I know he likes guys, he doesn’t like guys about his height so that’s another check on why Phil could never be with Dan.

I could never be as cute as this guy. No chance. And frankly I was bitter about it, so for the rest of the time I didn’t say much when they kept talking about cute guys and girls that would be his type and Dan kept looking at me noticing my absence. 

Was this some kind of sick joke he’s playing? Those he know that I like him. Probably not. If so, this is just too cruel for Dan to do.  


Weeks have pass and things just started changing. We were changing. He later got the courage to ask the guy, Tim, and he of course said yes to Dan so he started sitting with us at lunch and it was torture. Dan’s stupid cute smirks he gives to Tim were like the witty ones he gave to me when I accidently say something unconventional. I started to get angry and annoyed about everything so I did the only thing I could do… run away, for good. 

Dan was hurt for a while when I didn’t answer his text or that I hided in a room during lunch then going to the table. He would leave messages say

“hey what’s wrong? Did I do something?”

“hey you see that new episode.”

“uh did you change you number?”

He even went to my house. Luckily, every time he does, I’m usually out. It just I hate how it seem like everyone can see him with someone else but me. Am I that unattractive? Is it my personality? What do I need to do? I also need to deal with this curious jealousy. 

I also needed Dan to be happy and that’s not with me. We just weren’t as excited to talk to each other as we were in middle school, it became a freaking chore. And I’m not a chore and neither is he. 

We shouldn’t treat each other like a routine. Maybe this split was long pasted due? Even in the group chat compared to our own chat were different. He was livelier in them and better at responding to them then to me. 

With this separation I tried to become happy again. I really did. But every time I was up so high, I was crushed with knowing I don’t have Dan experiencing it with me or I couldn’t text him to tell him about it. I know why people say it’ll hurt me more than it will hurt you because this pain was stronger than anything I ever met, but I had to endure it. For the sake of both of our happiness I had to do this.

After a month of avoiding him and the gang. It spread around school that Dan and Tim broke up because Tim didn’t love him. All I wanted to do is to go to him and hug him and let him vent but it wasn’t my place to do that anymore. It never was my place in the first place. 

As I got home though, fate had different plans. Outside my door was Dan, himself, in his black hoodie covering his hobbit hair? And he looked piss both in alcohol and anger state. 

“Where the fuck have you been? I know you’ve been avoiding me” he said trying to stand up but failing but as I walked up the stairs I just sighed but deep down I was shocked a bit. He never used that tone when he cursed. It was usually playful. 

I just responded with “Go home Dan. You’re pissed.” As I walk to the porch and putting the key into the door.

“Of course ’m pissed because apparently my best friend is a homophobe. I didn’t expect that from you. I thought you would understand! Of all people phil. You were the person I was least worried about. ” 

That hurt. “I do understand! I’m not one. For goodness sake, my favorite aunt is gay. You’re talking crazy” I yelled unlocking the door. He grabbed the end of my jeans making me turn to him. 

“Then what is it? Why haven’t y’ talked to me? I hope y’ know I got dumped and I need my best friend.” He said with his slur being more visible. Ha. Best friend. I hate that word. We aren’t close anymore, we’re not best friends. 

“Why not just go to Chris or even cat. I can’t clean up your mess all the time.” Okay that came out wrong but I needed to get away. Away from this conversation, away from my feelings, but he wasn’t letting go anytime soon. 

As I open the door. I got tackled on my back. Okay maybe he really did become crazy. He turned me over as we were wresting for dominance and straddled me with him holding both wrist firmly on their side of my body. This position would be great for a porno. “Well I’m sorry Phil that you think I’m a mess. But ’m your mess. So jus’de-“ 

“No,” I cut him off “You’re not! You’re everyone’s mess but mine. I’m your last resort, so just close my relationship with you completely.” This confused Dan so much that it made him let go of my hands as I pulled away and just sat on me trying to understand where in the world this was coming from. 

“Why would you say ‘hat?” he said in a sad tone.

“Because it’s true. You don’t reply to my text as fast as you do in the chat and sometimes you’ll just read them and just reply to the group chat. I’m really nothing to you, am I? Just say it.” As I pushed him off me. 

I’ve had enough. I was almost crying. As I stood up I try to bolt out the house but Dan caught my arm and stepped close to my eyes.

He was looking right through me, I swear. “Phil, you’r the most important person to me besides ‘y family. And look ’m sorry if you feel that way because of me but ’m only like that because you know how I am. I’m a little dense at times. Just talk to me next.” He tried really hard not to slur but the slurring of words made the whole thing seem comical. 

“It’s not just that” I said in a clear quiet tone while looking down on the carpet. Dan looked confused by this. “Then what is it?”

“I can’t say.”

“Phil you’re being ridiculous. Tell ‘e!” I stayed quiet wishing this would end. We would end. It’s tiring. I’m tired. Then I felt warm arms wrapped around me. Even though he was frustrated, he still cared for me, as a friend, of course. 

“Phillip, I’ve know you since middle school. We ‘old each other ‘verything about each other. Please tell me what’s wrong.” 

“I’m jealous.” I cried out. I just needed to say it so it could be over. This was too embarrassing. This moment, this time, my life. 

“I’m jealous, Okay? Everyone gets your love but me. I’m jealous that you could never love a goof like me. I’m jealous of all the beautiful people who’ve you dated and whatever they have that I didn’t. I want to be wanted by you. I want you to be mine and its selfish and sick and pretty messed up but I can’t help my feelings.”

It was quiet as I tried to wrap around what he just admitted. How much I kind of regretted it. How much I want this to just be like it was in middle school. 

Dan always had to evaluate the situation fully before responding and when he did he simply said “Why don’t you think you can’t have these feelings? How do ‘ou know I don’t want ‘t too? Phil you’r a catch.”

“But not enough for you to want to sleep with or have an intimate relationship, I kn-“ before I could finish warm intoxicated lips attached to mine while a slow swift movement with those very arms clinging Deeping into my waist pulling me closer.

As it ended just as fast as it started I stared into those familiar eyes as the words “I never said I didn’t want more either” filled the room from out of his lips.


End file.
